Swedish Special Forces Snatch Kremlin Secret

Probable inspirational source.

You have never before heard of SABBA. That is because SABBA is the most lethal, small and ultra-secret special forces unit in the world. This elite of the elite of the elite consists of Captain K. Karlsson, Private M. Karlsson and Private Karlsson-on-the-Roof and has just returned by submarine from the ultimate raid.

SABBA got to the Kremlin by parachuting from outer space. Their raid was so successful and so unbelievably stealthy that not even the NSA knows about it until the publication of this blog post.

In the innermost situation room of the Kremlin the Ninja-Vikings found a USB marked SMERSH-SECRET. It contained the soundtrack for a future 3D movie to be called “Putin´s Heroes”. The main theme has a slight resemblance to the theme song of an old American motion picture about WWII (see the clip above). The lyrics - by one “A. Dugin” and to be sung by “the N. Wolves´ Choir” - have just been translated by Swedish military linguists. Here we go:

Obama & Bildt tried to warn me
But I held my head up high
All the time they phoned me
But I only passed them by
They also tried to tweet me
But I guess I didn't care
I burned my iPhone and
Left them shaking there

All the burning bridges that have fallen after me
All the great feelings and the burning memories
Everyone I left behind each time I closed the door
Burning bridges lost forevermore

Yanuk tried to help me get a country
A while ago
When I first lost it I didn't want to go
The spin Nuland gave to me
Really made my day
Now there's nothing left for me to say

All the burning bridges that have fallen after me
All the great feelings and the burning memories
Everyone I left behind each time I closed the door
Burning bridges lost forevermore

***

Now, seriously speaking, I have very strong feelings about what is happening in Ukraine. I love both Ukraine and Russia. I once even respected Vladimir Putin. FYI I have partly translated and also edited a book that perhaps better than any other book in English explains Ukraine´s 20th century: Victims, Victors.

What is happening is in my opinion insane and one of the greatest tragedies of the early 21st century. I can in no way see how invading Ukraine will be of any benefit to Russia. In fact, I can´t even see how it could be of any lasting benefit to the Kremlin. But instead of writing a serious blog post about my feelings I decided to try something else, inventing a crazy soundtrack for a particularly crazy war. And it is getting real hard to think up new crazy ideas now that Russian state media are using a dozen unarmed Swedes in their propaganda against Ukraine, to quote the Voice of Russia: “The rebel government in Ukraine is not even able to exercise sovereignty within its own borders, as Swedish Neo-Nazi groups have now begun to enter the country for militant training”. Note that the tiny Swedish volunteer group, a dozen guys, has even been transformed into “groups”. In spite of the microscopic size this group has even been debated in the Russian Federation Council: “Today's meeting of the Federation Council was an incredible sight to behold. Man after Soviet-looking man mounted the podium to deliver a short diatribe against...you name it. Against Ukrainian fascism, against Swedes…” Even after attention in several Swedish newspapers and on TV the “Swedish Ukraine volunteers” have just 245 followers on Facebook (March 3). There's nothing left for me to say…